Should I leave the barn I’m at (which means leaving Ziggy) that takes up so much of my time, money and effort, and instead spend that money at a lesson facility and get a couple of lessons a month?
Being where I am now really stresses me out. I’ve got a load of stuff happening at school already, I have my exams coming up, I’ve been having to take time off school because I’m too frazzled and my brain is just done right now, The thing is the yard where I Ziggy is, well, the facilities are extremely basic. I’m not asking for an indoor and a solarium, but we only have a grass arena, and everything is screwed from the floods. Plus, whenever I go there, half my time is taken up doing stuff that isn’t my responsibility (watering and feeding the horses… I’m only meant to do Ziggy’s care on the days I’m down, and I’m expected to help with and ride the difficult horses), and then I barely even get to ride Ziggy, even though that’s what I am paying to do. I’m paying for this and I end up doing work. I’m happy to put in some work with my friend’s OTTB and stuff, but I do not have time for the rest. And then on top, I’m not progressing with my riding. Having the part loan on Ziggy means I can’t afford lessons, and I do not learn by riding her, I can’t focus on myself because I’m always focused on her, and then because the ground we have to school on is uneven, when I finally get her into a good rythm on a 20m circle, she trips up and we have to start all over again. I love Ziggy and my yard owner has done so much for me… But at the end of the day it’s holding me back, and it’s eating up so much of my time, time I don’t have. I need to study. Two lessons a month would take up so much less time than being at the yard 3-4 days a week, for 3-8 hours at a time, and they would make me a far better rider. I know where I am now, my riding is just going downhill because I don’t have a trainer.
So what do I do? Do I stay here, which is easier for my yard owner, and ride, more often, to be fair, and keep riding my little Ziggy, or do I leave and just take lessons instead knowing they will help me a lot more and fit in with my life better?